Month three. A point in time that seemed so far away for so long was finally here. It arrived quickly and silently and before I knew it the holidays had passed and 2017 was coming to an end and 2018 was beginning. New beginnings- there were so many surrounding me in the months leading up to this one but this month was going to be preparation for maybe the biggest new beginning of all. Life after this transformative experience in my new home. Transformative- causing a marked change in someone or something. I was changed. And just as quickly as it all began it was officially my third and final month at Hilton Head Health. 

Week 9

HAPPY NEW YEAR - So, what's your New Year's resolution? This question and tradition is engrained in our culture year after year lists of goals and things we're going to get right this year.  Until we don't. And what is right anyway? Should, shouldn't, better than we were last year, than we are currently. I love New Year's and new beginnings but there is a lot of pressure on a moment at midnight and a fresh slate for the year ahead. By the beginning of February I've forgotten half of the things I wrote down and the rest I'm doing because I should not even because I want to.  And when I stop doing the things there is shame and sabotage and so much disappointment - in myself. That is why this year I decided in this new season I was in entering in this new year I resolved to not make resolutions. I wanted to be kind to myself just as I was and celebrate all of the things I did this last year and was currently doing. It was a lot. And I never wanted to forget it.  I love goals but sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in them and have our eyes on where we're hoping to go that it's easy to miss all the progress in the present. 

Week 10

I woke up one morning. It was a normal day like any other but I felt IT. It was that feeling that everything I was doing here felt like second nature. It wasn't something I had to do or felt like I should do but I knew I would do and could do.  I KNEW this would be a part of my life moving forward. I had hoped it would be before this but today, I FELT IT. That health and wellness was important to me. Self care, strength and loving my body no matter where it is on this journey. Forgetting the story I had told myself all these years about what my body can do. Unlearning what society has taught me about beauty. Sharing it and celebrating it. Every step of the way. This ordinary day on this regular week ended up being extraordinary because I knew I could. 

Week 11

This was the week I wanted to soak it all in. Seeing the end in sight and holding on to the feeling I had being right where I was. It was the week I started counting my "lasts" around campus but I knew they were all just beginnings. I remember being in a hip hop dance class with one of my favorite instructors Ashley and after class I hung around like I normally did but this time both of us told the other how much the experience has meant. How much we would miss each other. But that we have one more class together. One more. In my heart I hoped so many more but I knew that no matter how many times I return there will never be anything as sweet as that first time of discovery and learning in that way of the unknown and uncertain. And I cherished every minute of it. Closed my eyes tightly hoping it would remain just a little longer. 

Week 12

A week I never thought would arrive or could arrive was here. In someways it flew by. It other ways it felt like the perfect pace of time. I remember before this even began I couldn't imagine how I would feel and who I would be on the other end of this experience. Three months felt like such a long amount of time but in my whole life it's just a flash in the pan. That is the most beautiful part of it all. I went into this unsure but wide open and came out so certain and cracked open even wider than I ever thought possible. I was hopeful. I was ready. The last three months lead me to this moment and everything ahead of me was possible. I wasn't scared but inspired and excited to go live this new life. And I knew I would be back soon. That's the thing with those places and people that us. They remain with us forever no matter where we go. I knew this was just a chapter in my story and that it was just getting good. 

Here's to surprising ourselves. To wanting more for ourselves and going out and taking the time to do the things we never knew we could do. We deserve them. Here's to health AND happiness ahead. Here's to just getting started. 

A new kind of healthy, 

<3 Sarah 

We sat around the table and were simply asked a question in four words that left me speechless.

What is your WHY? Why are YOU here?  

I looked around the room and saw everyone shift in their seats. Their eyes looked up and they were hoping this was a rhetorical question instead of one we had to answer in front of everyone. It was just for us. The question and the answer to our why. The intention to our why and the reason we are here right now in our lives doing what we're doing. I could tell that some ladies didn't know. Some knew all too well and this wasn't the first time they had answered this question and it was hard for them to revisit it. Some never had thought about it before and just did the things they've been doing because they were told they should or had to.  

Out there it's easy to get clouded with influences and reasons that may interfere with your why and your motivation daily. Someone telling you you need to lose weight because they don't know how to love themselves. Doctors shaming you for health reasons to try to get you to diet because that's all they know how to do. Relationships reasoning you into changing because they may be unhappy. Society telling us all the things that are wrong with us instead of telling us what we are doing right. But here, it's a safe space that creates a place that is easier to focus on ourselves and for what we actually want and need to continue on this journey. Everything is illuminated. A space for people that have often focused on everything else but ourselves for so long.  Even if our original reason for arriving changes once we get here- then even better. Growth. Progress. Change. The right kind because we want to not because someone is telling us to. Our whys are now making it more about us and less about them. Focusing more about health and wellness instead of size and weight. I think when the why is our own reason and personal and genuine the rest will follow. 

I could tell you my why but I feel like there is a sort of sacredness to it. I'm finally doing it for me and that's the strength of it all. There have been other times I've tried to lose weight for other people or reasons and it never worked. Sure, it did initially but it never stayed off. This time, it's for me and this time it's not about the weight. It's about everything else but that and that is why I know this time is different and this time is beautiful. 

What is YOUR WHY?  Don't worry, the question and answer is for you and you alone. Think about it. Reflect on it and cherish it.  <3

Week 3 reflections: 

Doing things for ourselves isn't selfish, it's actually the furthest thing from it. 

There is so much pride and hope seeing other people transform before your eyes. They walk taller and faster and easier. Confidence. Mobility. Strength. 

A holiday away from home is a holiday full of more gratitude for the place you miss.

Thanksgiving can be more about the food on the table. It can be about the people you're sharing the meal with, the conversations you're having and the fact we have a beautiful plate in front of us even if it's not the Thanksgiving we are used to. 

Sometimes breaks and rest days are necessary. We can't be all or nothing all of the time. Take time for you so you can continue on stronger than before. 

Our stories inspire others even if we aren't trying. 

Mobility is a gift we have and shouldn't be taken for granted.

Self care is an act of health care. 

Eat the special whole waffles for breakfast the day they’re on the menu. Enjoy them and don’t agonize over any calories after that moment. 

Long catch up phone calls with friends that make you smile are necessary. So is seeing the friends that make you laugh until you cry. 

Listen to people's stories. Deeply. Quietly. You'll find out more about yourself than you think. 

Happiness is contagious even on the hard days. 

Laughter is the best medicine especially when you didn't realize you needed it. 

Finding our fitness style is an important thing- it's not all treadmills and ellipticals. 

Do the things you didn't think you could do but have always wanted to do. 

Our bodies want to move and get better and healthier. We just need to help them to do so. 

Be good to yourself this week,

<3 Sarah

It's when you can't imagine yourself where you currently are that the magic and wonder of it all falls into place. A year ago I was sitting at my desk stressed and rushing, emotionally eating yet trying to wrap up a lot of work before the holiday weekend and frustrated about it all.  It was so much more than that. It wasn't just a day at work that ran too long and took too much from me. It was a series of moments and those kind of days that I didn't even realize drove me to feeling I wanted a quality of life change and to live a healthier life. For being so happy and already on the journey of discovery and freedom that I was on at that current time, I was also so stressed and unhealthy. I didn't think about what I ate. I just ate it. My body hurt. I would never let on that it did but it did. A lot. I always made time for lots of things after work mostly food, events and friends but making time for my body, health, and  wellness wasn't in my schedule. I was burned out and it all was catching up to me and that day at the office was a "never again" moment and I had hoped it would someday be true. 

And now I'm here. It came true. A year later,  I never would have known I would be (that's the best part about it all is that  we never know where we're going to end up even though we want to so bad) but I'm so thankful I'm here, right now,  as I am. Such gratitude. Week two was a reminder of that. A reminder of the path I was on and the reassurance of the path I'm on now. A reminder that I am doing it. I'm here and this is real. This past week was a practice of motivation, dedication and kindness. Especially kindness towards myself. 

Here's some reflections on week 2:

Gratitude changes everything. Start each day with a grateful heart. 

Time is flying and time matters. Each day is valuable. Cherish it. 

This week was a lot harder than week one but also a lot easier. How can it be both? It was harder because I knew what was coming. I had experienced week one blindly, going slowly just to make it through all the initial activities without knowing the actual challenge ahead, the strength needed and the rewards the followed.   It was better- because of all of the things that made it harder but also, because I wanted to show up, do the work and be better. To show up and want to be better in my body is a new revelation that has been so rewarding to experience and learn. 

Improvement comes with time and practice. Even if you think your body won't improve, it will. Each day it gets strong and better if you're working on it. It's amazing to how such a short amount of time can give such amazing results in that. 

Keep going, even when you think it's hard. Don't give up because of a mistake, or something didn't go perfect, or you ate a certain way. Don't self sabotage. 

The non scale victories are more satisfying than the weekly weigh ins. 

It's OK to take time for you. To rest, nap, to honor your body and not push yourself. Don't feel guilty or bad about taking that time. It's needed. 

Doing things that make you feel good physically are much more fulfilling than things that don't and burn calories. Choose the movement that makes you feel happy, strong and confident. For years I just went to the gym and rode the elliptical. Over and over.  I was so bored. I felt like it was a chore. There's so much more out there I was missing out on, there's so much more out there.  

You're doing the best you can and it's better than you think. 

Afternoon beach walks are a wonderful way to end the day. Breathe in the sea air and pause. It is worth soaking in. 

Calories don't have to be paralyzing but just part of the picture. 

Awareness is everything. 

Kindness starts with ourselves. It's then amazing to see it spread to others. 

Take a new class,  especially if you have that flutter in your stomach of uncertainty. 

Sweating feels good. 

Focus on what you can do instead of what you can't. 

We are all on different paths. Honor the parts of the journey we're on differently and meet people were they're at. 

Meditation creates mindfulness. 

Don't let someone else's insecurities be a mirror for yours. 

There is strength in the uncomfortable moments. 

It's hard to sometimes be supported by others and ask for help but OK to lean on them. 

Go your own way and tune out the noise. Focus on your journey. 

People often see things you don't see in yourself or haven't seen in a while.  Listen to them when they remind you. 

There is so much more to do but don't forget to reflect on all that you've done. 

Be proud of yourself.

There are such special people here. Staff, group members, other guests. Smile at them and know they're feeling something you've felt before. There's a common ground here. 

It's so much more than weight loss. It's about strength, power, flexibility and movement. 

It's for you and you alone. 

Show up. 

Keep moving, keep going, keep growing. 

Week two was a lot of reflection a lot of celebration and a lot of challenges but every single day here has had a lesson. Amazing ones. Soul shaking ones. Life changing ones. Here's to more lessons, more challenges and celebrations and many more grateful days. 

Grateful for you today and every day, 

<3 Sarah 

Raise your hand if you sometimes believe the stories you've always told yourself about who you are and what you'll do in your life. I did and have. Even arriving here.  I alway told myself that while I was confident in my body and owning it no matter my size I would never be the person who was fit, or physical or would actually love to move just because that was the way I had always been. That celebrating food and life is all or nothing and that there's not a happy balance between a full life of living well and being well.

It's amazing when we let all that stuff go. The negative self talk, the fear, the stories. Let go of all the stuff holding us back from who's really under there and lean into the strong, fierce human in our hearts. It's in there. I promise. Even if you've forgotten about them for awhile. That person is ready to step out from the shadows of your stories and live the life you want for them even though its uncertain or scary or even uncomfortable. 

I knew coming here my inner person would get a shake up whether she was ready to come out or not. She is. She's here and even though it's a new territory for me it's more comfortable than I had ever imagined (or not imagine) all those years I was telling myself I was something other than  who I am now. 

Every single day here I've learned something new. About health, about wellness, about my body and about my strength.

Here's some of my lessons from week 1: 

Our bodies are meant to move and so inspiring when they do. They are beautiful no matter our shape or size and were and tear and should be taken better care of, we only have one. 

Gyms are scary and intimidating but this place isn't. It's safe and inclusive and welcoming and giving a space for so many to learn about ourselves which is vulnerable and difficult to do but it's been so beautiful to see the people around me do it. I've already seen bodies change, confidence soar and people growing in ways that isn't always reflected on the scale. I want everyone to feel safe in the space they workout in. 

It's not always about that number on the scale. It's about so much more. 

Breathe through it. 

Everyone has a story. Meet them where they're at and honor it.

Not everyone will support the journey you're on, focus on the ones who will. 

Wearing fun workout clothes makes workouts more fun.

Take a cardio class instead of a nap you'll feel more energized.

 Food can be celebrated in new ways and there can be new rituals around it.

Eat the rainbow.

Slow down you're eating too fast.

Stretching is a form of self care and an important end to every work out.

Start each day with a grateful heart.

Walk the long way home. 

Smile, it makes workouts more enjoyable for you and everyone around you.

Throwing a 10 pound medicine ball can be more comforting than emotionally eating. 

Get up for the 7AM beach walk, it's worth it.

 Be open to new experiences and unexpected opportunities will come from them.

Try new things. 

Talk to someone new today no matter their age or what you think they'll give you in return, just connect.  

Keep breathing.  

Be vulnerable and honest with yourself and others of where you're at and celebrate it and you.

 Be kind to those along the way but also be just as kind to yourself.

Get rid of negative self talk.

Support others. We need each other. 

Get out of your own way.  

Trust the process. 

It's your turn and it's ok to put you first. 

You're just getting started. 

And that was just week one! Wow. Here is to the week ahead. Thank you for being here. For reading my words, following my journey and for your support and kindness. I send it all back to you so you can have a strong and inspiring week too. I would love to hear your lessons from the week you just had. Tell me the things that inspired you. Send me a note and don't forget to be kind to yourself this week!  

WE'VE GOT THIS. 

<3 Sarah 

I’ve made a lot of changes lately. Big ones. Most of which you know, but it’s amazing that a series of life changes and choices lead me to exactly where I needed to be even if I never could imagine needing to be here.
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If you’re reading this I’m officially on my next adventure and though I’ve had a lot of life changing ones lately I know this is a once in a life time experience.
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I’m writing you from Hilton Head Island- my home for the next couple months as I embark on a new journey of health, wellness, and inspiration. There is a special place called @hiltonheadhealth and they’re changing lives. They’ve invited me to come and live with them for a little and do their programs and share my story along the way. To document the days, to tell you about my experiences here and to live it. The result? A practice of self care, love and strength like I’ve never given myself before. It’s time for that. It’s time to take care of myself in a way I’ve never known how. To learn how and to do it. I deserve it. We all do. ✨ 
It’s not about a number on the scale for me but to live well in the body I’m in and to make it stronger like the rest of me. To learn about nutrition, emotions and how both affect me because they do. To continue to love & celebrate food but also love and celebrate me. To be present, mindful and grateful about where I am on the journey and to honor it. To try new physical things, scary things and not say no because I’m worried about how my body will get in the way. To not letting my body get in the way and to doing the damn things. To sharing it all with you. The fun, the new, the healthy & delicious and the uncertain. The good days and the hard days. We all may be on our own paths and journeys with wellness, our bodies, food and how we feel about all of the things that go along with those three words but there is a common thread that brings us together. I hope to share my experiences with you and hopefully we’ll all find some inspiration together along the way. ✨
It starts tomorrow. I’ll be sharing on here and my new site that will be launching this week too! In the meantime, say Y E S to adventure and to yourself- you never know where it may lead🦋